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Men of Valor honors the presence and critical roles of BOTH their mothers and their fathers in the lives of their children. Current research confirms what common sense teaches: the presence of BOTH mother and father is vital to the optimum development of these children whether the marriage is happy and solid, fragile, or has disintegrated completely. We encourage ALL fathers to become more active and effective leaders in the SPIRITUAL and CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT of their children. Ultimately, our hope is to provide MULTIPLE AND ONGOING WEEK-END OR WEEK-LONG CHRISTIAN MOUNTAIN CAMPS for ALL FATHERS (whether happily married, unhappily married, divorced, or never married) alongside ALL OF THEIR CHILDREN, and alongside their GRANDFATHERS. By encouraging this MULTI-GENERATIONAL family re-union, we hope to re-engage and spotlight ALL fathers in a positive manner in the eyes of their children. We hope to re-engage fathers, alongside their children, in a more effective way, in the spiritual lives of their children, their families, and in the church community. Is not the encouragement, empowerment, and equipping of fathers to don the mantle of spiritual leadership responsibilities for their children and their families a Biblical mandate? (see Genesis 18:19, Deuteronomy 6:6-9, and Malachi 4:6). This is critical for intact families. How much more may this encouragement be needed for fathers and children no longer in an originally intact family following disolution of marriage? And for the never-married fathers, completely adrift from their children, perhaps this encouragement and spiritual equipping could be a lifeline for them and their children.
Men Of Valor
are
Faithful Fathers
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The relationship between a mother and a father with their own children is unique and God-given. Both mothers and fathers have long enjoyed the responsibility and privilege or raising and nurturing their children. Perhaps as never before, fathers may need to be actively encouraged, equipped, and empowered to step forward on behalf of their families.
CONSIDER: The following applies to the spiritual leadership of fathers. Although the data is from Christian sources, it may well be of interest to non-Christians.
Men's membership in churches nationwide has fallen recently from 47% to 39% (Saddleback Church Data). Were this trend to continue, the Christian spiritual discipleship of these fathers for their families would probably diminish substantially.
Data from the Billy Graham Crusade confirms that "in 92% of the times when fathers come to salvation (through a commitment to Jesus Christ), the remainder of their families come along with them". This compares to only 19% when the mothers "come to salvation", according to Billy Graham. The unmistakeable conclusion: get the fathers, get the family!!! "Save" the fathers, "save" the family!!!
Yet, the basic fabric of our society, the traditional family unit consisting of mother, father, and their children, is under attack by those who would redefine family and/or separate one parent or the other from their children.
For instance, nationwide data indicates that following 85% of divorces one parent or the other is designated as a non-custodial parent. This non-custodial parent, on average, is allowed to be with their own children only one overnight every two weeks. Non-custodial parents are typically (85%), but not always, the father. Does this society sanctioned / court imposed fatherlessness matter?
In Colorado, according to Colorado Attorney General John Suthers), "The single most defining characterstic of the (Colorado) prison population, even more so than race, drug problems or high school dropout, is father-less-ness. Almost 7 in 10 inmates in Colorado, and throughout the country for that matter, have never lived with their natural father. Only one in 10 are from an intact two parent family. The great social divide in America today is between the parented and the unparented." Thus, father-less-ness is a common denominator for many felons.
According to Father Facts, 2002, Wade Horn, Ph.D., "Children who live absent their biological fathers are on the average at least two to three times more likely to use drugs, to experience educational, health, emotional, and behavioral problems, to be victims of child abuse, and to engage in criminal behavior than those who live with (both ) their biological parents".
A recent national survey conducted by the Radcliff Public Policy Center in 2000 determined, " A resounding 96% of respondents in a national survey agreed that parents should share equally in the care taking of children (Cambridge, MA).
President George Bush has stated, "Over the past four decades, father-less-ness has emerged as one of our greatest social problems. We know that children who grow up with absent fathers can suffer lasting damage. They are more likely to end up in poverty or drop out of school, become addicted to drugs, have a child out of wedlock, or end up in prison" (speaking at the National Fatherhood Initiative's Fourth Annual National Summit on Fatherhood in Washington, D.C., June 7, 2001), and
Whereas, former President Bill Clinton has stated, "The single biggest social problem in our society may be the growing absence of fathers from their children's homes because it contributes to so many other social problems" (speech at the University of Texas, Austin, October 16, 1995, from Father Facts, 2002),
Therefore,
Let us recognize that in most instances, barring neglect, abuse, or parental addiction to habituating substances, when each parent desires to be in the life of his/her children (whether the family is intact or not), it is in most children's best interest to maintain an even balance of this primary relationship, with each of their parents (both their mothers and their fathers) whenever possible.
May we have hearing ears, seeing eyes, and softened hearts for our children crying for the presence of both of their parents. They need BOTH parents. They especially need the father for their full spiritual development.
Steven W. Newell, M.D., founder
Men of Valor
9492 E. Aspen Hill Place
Lone Tree, CO 80124
Telephone: 720-635-5000
Fax: 303-790-4004
email: swnewellmd@menofvalor.net
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We will provide CAMP SCHOLARSHIPS TO AS MANY FATHERS AND THEIR CHILDREN AS POSSIBLE who need financial assistance in order to attend Men of Valor sponsored weekend or weeklong summer camps in the beautiful mountains of Colorado.
The
Best Parent
is
BOTH Mom
And Dad
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For more information or questions, or to receive updates for meetings, events, etc., email your contact information to: men-of-valor@comcast.net -or- fax to 303-790-4004.
Please include your first, last name and middle initial, home, cell and work telephone, fax, email, and street address including zip code. Please also include if you want to assist us in some manner and what you would like to do. Thank you.
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